Pixie and Bob Stocking, who knew each for 65 years and were married for 61, centered their lives around their three sons and four grandchildren. As Bob’s obituary noted, “The endless joy he received from his wife, sons, grandchildren, and extended family showed us all that there is no higher calling in life than to love one another.” The family will always miss Bob, who—with the support of Duke HomeCare & Hospice—died in his home in May 2023 at the age of 88. 

Bob was a hands-on father who never missed one of his sons’ sporting events. In addition to being a devoted family man, he was a gifted teacher. While raising his family in New England, Bob taught math and computers. He was consistently honored with teaching awards. After Bob and Pixie semi-retired, they moved to Durham to be closer to their older son and his family. Bob saw an ad saying that Durham Tech was seeking a teacher for a course in information. He applied for and got the job, which he kept for 12 years.  

Last year, after being hospitalized for fluid in his lungs, Bob was given the choice of entering a nursing home or home hospice. Pixie, who worked as a nurse for more than 60 years, wanted to care for Bob at home, which she did for the last three weeks of his life. Their eldest son, Bob Jr., helped his parents at home each of those days. Pixie also engaged Duke HomeCare & Hospice (DHCH). 

Maria, the Duke HomeCare & Hospice nurse who cared for Bob, clicked with Bob from the moment they met. Bob’s favorite musical was West Side Story, whose main character is named Maria. “Bob would sing the song Maria to her, which she adored, and he adored her,” says Pixie. “Maria has so much inside of her to give, and she gave so freely. She was very thoughtful and caring, and Bob loved her, which was the most important thing to me.” 

Pixie notes the kindness and commitment of the DHCH intake team. “I was so pleased with how thorough they were with their questioning and how calm and easy they were with Bob,” she says. “And as soon as they finished with his history, they physically turned to me and said, ‘And what can we do for you?’ I was quite impressed with that.” 

That attention to the entire family extended to the chaplain and the social worker who provided support. The Stockings expressed their desire to know exactly what was happening with Bob and appreciated the team’s honesty and directness. “I have nothing but positive things to say about everyone at Duke HomeCare & Hospice,” says Pixie. 

They are thoughtful and caring and they always put the patient first. They just wanted us as a couple to be together and be cared for and we were cared for very well.

Pixie says that being a widow is the hardest thing she has ever done. She turned to DHCH’s Bereavement Services for support, attending a six-week program for those who had lost a spouse within the year. “The group and facilitators—bereavement counselors Lindsay Gallo and Stacy NAME—provided a wonderful way to slowly get into grieving,” says Pixie. Once the group ended, Pixie received individual counseling from Bereavement Services grief counselor Lindsey Gallo, whom she still sees occasionally for support. 

Pixie is grateful that Bob's passing was painless and at home. “He just drifted away while my son was holding one hand and I was holding the other,” she says. “He took three breaths, and the last one was his very last. It was a beautiful, peaceful way to go.” 

“The night before Bob died, at 4:30 in the morning, we both woke up,” says Pixie. “He took my face in his hands, and he said to me, ‘I have cherished you all of my life, and I will cherish you for the rest of your life.’” It was a love story for the ages.